That's the fact that you love me ,baby .

heyyyylow ! :)

alhamdulillah , i got through the audition !!! weeeeehooooo ! hehe . so happy . eventho i sang just about 4 lines (?) , i got through . lol . i was like looking down on the floor . i was shy and i can feel my cheeks were burning ! damn ~ ohya , i really wanna overcome my stage fright mayn ! damn it . can someone actually help me ? gimme some tips ! gahh ~ this is really getting on my nerves ! i really wanted this thing so badly then what if when i'm out there , i will froze , speechless and nothing comes out of my mouth ? gahhhh !!! :(

teacher said our first showcase (the finalists) , is on the chinese new year concert ! how bout that huh ? godhelpmeplease ~ :( i'm shy . i wanna enjoy myself but how am i gonna do so if i'm shyyyyy ? damn you la shyness ! poof !
ohya , must prepare a powerpoint slide about myself and put a photo of me too . thats why i went to ally's house just now as she let me use her clothes and she put on make-ups for me and then , pose around . damn , i wore a dress for the first few captures . "feminine" la kaaan . lol . sial , tak kena ngn aku -.- then , next is the "rock chiq" lol . this one kinda suit me . hehs . next , is the "idontknowwhattype" . haha , like one side of the shirt flop down to show my shoulder . next is the "hawaiian" type . this one was kinda okay . however , i'm only gonna choose one . hehes . thanks to ally and tiqa . thank you guys so much ! love youuu~

i think its time . you go on your own , i cant take it anymore . i don't wanna give any hopes for any other guys . enough is enough . i've had enough of blames . well , they thought that i was giving them hopes but actually , they are the ones who actually fell for me . like hello ? i didn't ask for you to fall for me . well , you know now i'm busy and i wanna really concentrate on my studies . i have to catch up with alot of dates with little time to do it and i don't have time for all this shits that you guys out there are treating me like . heyy , and you think by avoiding me is the best way , then do whatever you want . i will not talk and bother your life anymore . and let me tell you this , you idea is stupid ! it is fucking dumb okay ! i am waayy much more happier with my beloved friends around me then you alone comforting me . i cant bear losing friends but if this is the way you want it , well hellyeah , you're gonna get it , get it ? fuck off then . dont talk to me . keep your distance and treat me like as if i have a disease or something . treat me as worse as you like as i'm very greatful to my great god that i still have friends around me eventho you hate me just becoz of a stupid reason . well boy , think deeply .. its not the time yet for all this . its not like as if we get together now and live happily ever after and i'm gonna marry you . its time for us to enjoy and live our life to the fullest . and if you wanna play with my feelings , fuck off coz i'm not a toy . go and get others or might as well , get a doll for yourself okehh ? well , i'm gonna shut the fuck up right now and i'm telling you , i might be smiling and laughing like hell but deep inside there , i just wanna cry each time i am treated this way but i'm gonna fucking show you that i'm strong to face all this and i'm not one girl that gonna keep on apologising when i know i'm not at wrong and you think you're special ? well , think again !

-why must love always feels like a battlefield ?
ira ; doryy ; hikuii~

Labels: your reasons are fucking stupid ..